Ladies and gentlemen, this morning I have built a piano stand. It is a fine piano stand and well constructed. I even went out and bought some screwdrivers for the purpose. However, I have now come to step three on the "how to build a full-sized piano" instructions, and this step involves lifting section A (the actual top of the piano, keyboard etc) above the stand and placing it carefully onto the slots that hold it in place before then screwing it firmly on. Unfortunately, section A is roughly as heavy as ten fully grown elephants and just as awkwardly shaped. Using the principle of leverage I've managed to get it on top of my chest of drawers which are about level in height with the stand, but lifting it up and into position is sadly beyond me. This is most definitely a two person job. So...if anyone out there fancies popping round today to undertake some heavy lifting for me, I shall reward you well in beer, curry, gin or whatever else takes your fancy. Any offers?!
Self assembly pianos. Most definitely not recommended.