Monday, February 26, 2007
The next morning we all got up at about 11 and ate toast, and then Jo and I went for lunch at Strada. The food and service were excellent, and it was such a nice treat. The afternoon and evening I spent eating more toast and watching Sex and the City, and it was brilliant to watch something that didn't make me cry. There were no happy endings, no blind assumption that the girl will always get the guy, and plenty of the realism of being single. Of course I know it ends up annoyingly well in the end of the last series, but series 2 is great and also makes me feel good that I'm only 24 and not 33.
Fabulous party, gorgeous lunch out and snuggly me-time. An excellent weekend.
Saturday, February 24, 2007
Friday, February 23, 2007
Now, however, I'm going to celebrate my tentative new beginnings with a nice glass of gin. Excellent.
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Saturday, February 17, 2007
Cheerful stuff this, isn't it?!
Anyway, I eventually fell asleep hoping that life would look better in the morning. This soon turned out not to be the case when I woke up feeling so tired that I thought I might throw up. Someone had apparently attached weights to my eyelids as well and in general I was still as completely depressed as I had been the night before. I made it to work and spent the morning silently uttering my favourite phrase of the moment, "It's ok, I won't be here next year" which is such a happy thought at times like that. By the afternoon the sun had broken through the clouds and I was feeling much happier again - I can never stay totally depressed for very long which is reassuring as I do worry sometimes that I seem to be feeling sad an awful lot lately. I was still absolutely knackered but everyone was going out after work so I made the effort to come out for one, which obviously led to me being one of the three people left in the bar at 9.30. Unfortunately by this point a vast amount of wine had been consumed (I will never ever learn) and I have no idea how this next bit happened, but somehow I ended up sobbing hysterically in the bar in full view of the general public, about how my life was total crap, I would never meet a man and I was rubbish at my job. One of our Officers was there and told me that this was all bollocks and I was in fact fantastic at my job, which in hindsight was nice to hear.
Anyway, this morning I woke up highly embarrassed about the whole affair and with a pretty cracking hangover as well. I haven't cried in a pub in public for a year and a half now and I'm fairly concerned that it happened, but I know I can prevent it happenening again by not drinking wine (whether this will actually be achievable I don't know) and I have no idea of how to cheer myself up, so I may as well soldier on and look forward to next weekend, when the girls and I will be enjoying an evening of smut and innuendo and I can have a good gossip with people I haven't seen for a while. Plus I haven't got any more open days to worry about until April so that has to be another good sign!
Apologies for another depressing post, but I thought this blog ought to be a bit more honest. I usually write about incidents like this in Word and then save them on my computer, but I thought that this is supposed to be a record of my life and that should include bad times as well as good. Hopefully when another good period comes round I'll be able to look back at this and be even more grateful that I'm happy - and the fact that I'm even thinking that there will be good times ahead has cheered me up a little already. I hope they come round soon.
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Thursday, February 08, 2007
I also like my Wind Orchestra hoody. Combined with a vest top, work top, polo neck jumper, coat, tights, trousers, socks, boots, scarf and gloves, it stopped me from being too cold on my mammoth bus journey this morning.
I don't like Stagecoach. Given the state of the roads this morning I was fully expecting them to cancel the buses but they battled on regardless in a quite unusual feat of public-spiritedness. This is probably a good thing overall, but the appearance of the X17 this morning did rather spoil the nice dream I was having at the bus stop of going home, wrapping up in my duvet and watching chick flicks all day.
Tomorrow night I think one of two things are going to happen. Either the slush will freeze and I'll fall down, or it'll rain before it freezes and...I'll fall down. Neither of these options are particularly appealing. However, it is Friday tomorrow and I get to go for drinks with Michelle and then see all my lovely friends in the pub.
At this particular point in time, I also rather like Baileys.
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
From the age of 9 upwards, I absolutely hated PE at school. I was completely hopeless at every single activity we ever did, and came last in everything except for the long jump when I came…second last. The day when I finished year 11 and never had to do compulsory sport again was a happy one indeed. For the next two years the only exercise I had was walking to school and back (which to be fair was 3 miles a day so not a bad distance) and then when I started at university I did pretty much nothing at all. Over the past couple of years I’ve started to feel really unhealthy, and eventually I felt so unfit that I decided I just had to do something about it even if I hated it and didn’t lose any weight.
I’ve now been going to the gym three times a week since the end of October – and I absolutely love it! The feeling of pushing yourself as hard as you can to a soundtrack of brilliantly cheesy music re-mixed to a dance beat is just brilliant. I think the only word that describes it properly is “euphoria”. My favourite song from all the many CDs they have at the moment is Take On Me, and when it plays I go faster than ever and have to seriously resist the urge to wave my arm in the air in classic Sarah-dancing-like-a-nutter pose. When I’m exercising I’m the happiest and most content that I am all day, because I don’t have room for complex thoughts in my brain. I feel like the archetypal modern woman: successful day at work, gym, cooking dinner and then relaxing for a couple of hours, and I also feel like I love my life. I never would have believed it, but working out has become one of my favourite things.
Of course, it helps that it’s also pretty effective in aiding weight loss! I had my 3rd weigh and measure today, and as well as confirming that I’ve lost half a stone it also showed me that 5.5 pounds of what I lost was fat which is excellent. On top of that, I’ve lost a total of 8 inches overall of which 2 have come off my waist! You can’t get much better motivation than that.
PS: Wish me luck for my event tomorrow…70 kids to entertain for a day and lots of potential for stress. I think that this time tomorrow evening I may well have a drink in my hand!
Sunday, February 04, 2007
- Stayed up until past 12 on two consecutive nights, thus actually making the most of not having to get up
- Mastered the afore-mentioned reverse round a corner
- Had my hair cut into a style that suits its longer length - it feels so good not to have masses of it falling round my face!
- Tried on ball dresses and danced round my room - excitingly, they're all too big except for last year's green one which is good for the self esteem, and I think the addition of the optional straps to the red one will mean I can wear it without it falling off (breast flashing not such a good look...)
- Travelled in a bright pink taxi
- Drunk a very strong cocktail and a shot of Sambuca in a bar on Broad Street
- Cut my feet to shreds in my stupid shoes - blood, blisters, the works
- Stayed in bed until 12, which has to be one of the best ways to spend a Sunday morning
- Had a late gossipy lunch in The Sausage
- Been back to bed and slept for another hour on Sunday afternoon - bliss
- Drooled over the exceptionally attractive Hugh Grant who was being charming and funny on Top Gear
- Not been depressed!!! Hurrah.
Saturday, February 03, 2007
I'm feeling fairly legendary this morning in many ways...not only is the driving progressing well, but I'm also keeping up with my other goals that I set for the year. I've been frankly fabulous at work this month, and I've not only saved my target £200 but I've also underspent by another £30 which I'm saving in case we end up going on holiday this year. Also, this morning I weighed myself and I've lost half a stone - woooooo!
The weather's gorgeous today and I'm going out to get my hair cut this afternoon. The world is definitely looking more positive. :o)