Answers on a postcard please!

I just found some amusing questions on someone else's blog and thought I would steal some of them.

If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
If a 999 operator has a heart attack, who do they call?
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly bits here and then drink whatever comes out?"
Why do toasters always have a setting which burns toast to a horrible crisp that no-one would actually eat?

The toast one is particularly interesting. Can anyone hazard a guess?

Baileys...

...is goooooood. It's so nice to come home on a Friday night and have a nice glass of it before making dinner.

Working on a Saturday...is baaaaaad. Damn open day. If there is anyone at all out there in the whole entire world who isn't recovering from beer and cheese on Saturday night and wants to go out, please let me know! I really want to go out and can't find a single other person who does. Silly silly Saturday work! :o)

Moky and pooky

These are two fab words I have inherited from my mum and describe how I am feeling now perfectly: basically a bit manky and ill. I think I've caught Juicy's bug! Error.

I had such a good evening on Sunday! I met my parents in Symphony Hall at 5, then we went for lunch at The Locks in Brindley Place. I had a spritzer and we ate yummy wraps, then we had hot chocolate and I had a brownie and icecream! Yum. It was lovely to catch up in such a nice setting - my parents are so cool! They had been to the British Museum the day before to see the new Persian exhibition, and showed me some postcards of the amazing gold goblets and statues that they saw.

After dinner we went back to Symphony Hall to see Ex Cathedra, a really fab Midlands choir, perform Haydn's Nelson Mass and Mozart's Requiem. The performance was just perfect with real energy, and the choir, soloists and orchestra were all excellent. The conductor interpreted it really well and the whole thing was just complete class. It was brilliant to sit in such a gorgeous hall and listen to such wonderful music. Hurrah for cultural evenings, especially ones of real quality. I'm really looking forward to doing it all again in November when we go to see the City of Birmingham Choir and CBSO do the Verdi Requiem - Verdi rocks anyway and when combined with a meal out and a parental catch-up it will be just fab.

Back to work this morning: rain and wind and mank! I did lots of data entry which was quite fun and went to a couple of meetings. We have another open day at the end of the week so it's another 6 day job - arse to 1 day weekends! But that's the last one of the year now which is good. I started feeling manky towards the end of the day and got home feeling really crap, but I've now eaten yummy sausage casserole and cuddled up and now still feel rancid but also happy. Plus I've mended my trousers which broke in quite an embarrassing place last week, so it's all good! :o)

I shall cease these pointless ramblings now.

A gentle Sunday afternoon in the life of Sarah

I have a new mop bucket. It is red.

That is all.

Sam's A to Z

A: The most Audacious thing you’ve ever done
Hmm...really can't think of anything! A rather bad start.

B: Favourite Badger joke
I may have to adapt one of my many elephant jokes for this purpose.
Why did the elephants come over the hill?
Because it was Thursday.

C: Favourite Curry
Many at different times, but currently Chicken Karahi

D: Number of drinks it takes to get utterly Drunk
A bottle and a half of wine. I think everyone knows this one!

E: Your most Effeminate characteristic
Well I'm female so pretty much everything! Probably my tendency to cry at almost all films.

F: The last thing that you got for Free
The work jolly I've just come back from! A night in a £145 per night double room with huge bathroom and enormous quantities of extremely delicious food. Not only was this all free but I actually got paid to be there! Definitely worth all the work we had to do while we were there.

G: Number of times that you’ve visited a Gym
Twice, to go to aerobics on campus. Will hopefully be going to regular classes at the work sports centre from next week.

H: Where you call Home
The lovely Leamington Spa.

I: (leaving things open for dodgy minds…) Any Instruments that you play
Perfectly innocently: oboe, bass oboe (for 3 weeks...beef), piano, descant recorder, tenor recorder, bass recorder (badly), Irish whistle (extremely badly), violin (between the ages of 9 and 13. Error.)

J: (and again…) Favourite Juice
The lovely Juicy Young!

K: Song that you would sing Karaoke to
An interesting question. I've never thought about this one! Something extremely cheesy. I may have to get back to you!

L: Number of times you’ve Laminated – and if you’ve achieved your laminating qualifications from the MC Office yet
Oh many many times. I believe I gained some kind of graduate qualification after becoming the first person to laminate Shreddies in the shape of Stuart Dunlop's initials. Happy days...

M: (As seen on the BBC News website:) How much Money do you think you’d need to be happy?
Enough to live in a really nice flat with a new kitchen and bathroom, to be able to afford clothes when I need them, to be able to go out, to be able to have one foreign holiday a year and to be able to have the occasional treat. To be fair, I have enough money now to live happily but I can't yet buy everything I'd like.

N: Favourite Naan to have with aforementioned curry
Don't actually like naan! Except in India when it was the only way of taking away the heat of the curries.

O: Your Oldest possession
My teddy bear, Benjy. He was made for me before I was born and has movable joints. His blue colour has now gone rather brown but he is still lovely.

P: Your worst Phobia
Spiders. Arg!

Q: Something that makes you feel Queasy
Heights.

R: Recent New Year Resolutions made, and how many still going
Didn't make any. I did decide to lose weight in February though and am still going on that one.

S: Favourite Season
Hmm. They all have their merits but I would have to say the carefree spirit and beautiful weather of summer (all 2 weeks of it!)

T: Number of cups of Tea consumed per day (on average)
None! No coffee either. You may stone me for heresy now.

U: The most Useful lesson you’ve ever learnt:
Do not drink a vat of wine! No, actually I'd say the fact that I can live on my own and I am perfectly capable of budgeting, running a home and getting a better paid job, and impressing the people I work with. Oh, and the fact that I have the best friends in the world!

V: Number of Valentines cards received (either in your life or in the last year – depending on how popular you are!)
4 in my life, all from one person.

W: A film that can make you Weep
Practically any film ever made - see above. However, I did cry about 10 separate times in Love Actually.

X: Have you ever dyed your hair to become Xanthocomic (Blonde: link)
I've never dyed my hair.

Y: Your Youngest memory (removed the yeti question now I’m afraid!)
Does this mean youngest as in most recent, or the one from when I was youngest? Assuming the latter, I remember eating scrambled eggs with my mum before going out, before I was at school, and I remember the day my brother was born which was also before I was at school.

Z: Favourite animal you could see in a Zoo
Penguins! They're cool.

It's my birthday!

Yay! Along with the lovely Juicy and Alicia, I have now reached the age of 23. Bizarrely I don't feel old: this may be to do with being the youngest person in my office and being told I'm lucky to be so young all the time. Anyway, on this day I feel that it is my duty to bring you all a very important piece of advice. This is a life lesson which I have learned over the past couple of weeks and which I learned good and proper this morning when I spent two hours feeling rougher than the arse of an extremely elderly badger. And the lesson is this.

Do not drink a vat of wine.

I feel that if I had worked this out earlier I wouldn't have had to be manoeuvred home by Dave last night (thankyou Dave, you are a star) due to not actually being able to stand up. Also I would not have got in the house too drunk to even blog, which is a first, and I would have been able to do more than leave a trail of bags, keys and items of clothing between the door and the bed before collapsing into said bed and passing out. Also, this morning I would not have felt so ill.

But now I feel better (Ibuprofen, you are my friend) and happy and excited. I'm still such a little girl when it comes to birthdays! And apart from the end result, last night was brilliant and I had such a good time. Lu - thankyou for being such a good girly friend! Alicia and Andy - thankyou for looking after me and for the lift there and back, and for the mysterious bag of parcels which appeared in my flat and which I assume were from you! Dave - as above. Sorry! And Rachel - thankyou for such lovely thoughtful presents. We will find our Mr Darcys!

Right, time to dry my hair. I shall see most of you tonight! xxx

Turn your comments back on people!

So I can't comment on Sam's blog either. Very much liked answer "I", and ooh, I love Pizza Express too! When can we go back there? Liked the Yeti question; my answer would sadly have to be none, until someone takes me to the Himalayas!

The Blog of Lu

Since Lu's blog has restricted commenting permissions I would just like to say here, for those of you who read the last entry - I totally totally agree with the humanities lift thing. What is people's problem?!

Ooh, and Happy Birthday to the lovely lady herself! Lu, you rock. xxx

I want icecream

Want it now. Now now now. Big tub of Ben and Jerry's. Arrrg! Think I will go buy some on my birthday.

In other news, I've started my job and it's going very well. I haven't really had anything to do yet but everyone has been lovely to me and they're all fab people. They also seem to enjoy their work which is a good sign! I have a desk and a computer which is apparently a good sign as most people don't have these when they start, and I might even have a login code soon... I also have an ID badge which isn't yet activated but will soon allow me to actually get into the office. Unfortunately I didn't brush my hair before I had the photo taken so I look like something out of the 70s. Actually I look a lot like my mother! We're going on a team building course next week, so I get to stay in a hotel for a night with free food, and we're having spa treatments between the course and the dinner on Monday. I'm having a water bed massage!

The down side of this is that I have to work at an open day on Saturday. I do get time and a half pay though! Then I'm going out with Lu for her birthday and then it's my birthday! Woo. Next week should be fab too - apart from the awaydays I'm going to a makeover party which will be a lovely girly evening. And this week it's Chelsea's birthday bash which should be excellent. Hurrah for friends and fun.

A to Z

Ok so this is shamelessly copied from Ben's blog, but I thought it was fun. And to be fair it's the first one of these I've ever done.

A – AREA CODE YOU ARE IN RIGHT NOW:
CV32

B- BIRTHDAY:
16th October (this Sunday!)

C- CURRENT CRUSH:
None, very boringly. Although I did used to fancy someone at work...

D- FAVOURITE DRINK:
Actually can't answer this! Depending on my mood: white wine, Baileys, any creamy cocktail

E- LAST THING EATEN:
Cod, new potatoes, broccoli and peas all covered in lemon juice and balsamic vinegar. Balsamic vinegar rocks.

F- FAVORITE FOOD:
Roast chicken with my mum's legendary bread sauce

G- WHAT GRADE ARE YOU IN:
Arg! Feel highly elderly having left education over a year ago now...

H- CURRENTLY HATE:
Hmm. Don't hate things as such, just take dislikes to lots of things throughout the day and then forget them! Today's was buses that turn up late - still made it to work on time though.

I- I THINK:
I am happy and cosy and content in my living room, and wouldn't want to be anywhere else!

J- CURRENT JOB:
As of this morning, I'm a Recruitment and Admissions Assistant at Coventry University. It rocks!

K- ANY KIDS:
Nooo. No plans to have anything to do with these until I'm at least 29!

L- I LOVE:
My family, my fabulous friends, my flat, icecream (darn diet), shopping (darn lack of money), cocktails and going out all dressed up.

M- FAVORITE MOVIE:
Apollo 13

N- YOUR PHONE NUMBER:
Don't really want to put that on a public blog! If I know you and you haven't got it then let me know.

O- OVER OR UNDER:
Not sure what this is supposed to refer to! Is it meant to be dodgy? Or have I just acquired the filthy mind of Juicy having spent too long in her presence? I'll say under.

P- FAVORITE PERFUME/COLOGNE:
Light Blue by Dolce & Gabbana

Q- ANY LITTLE QUIRKS ABOUT YOURSELF?:
I talk to myself constantly, both in my flat and while walking along which is v embarrassing when someone comes round a corner unexpectedly and I've got a bit loud.

R- LAST ROAD TRIP:
Well I can't drive and haven't been on a proper road trip - I reckon the last long journey must be tour.

S- DO YOU SMOKE?:
No and I never will.

T- FAVORITE TV SHOW:
The X Factor! Yes I am sad and have no taste. I do also like proper intelligent programmes but The X Factor is currently the only thing on that I absolutely have to watch.

U- COLOR OF YOUR UNDERWEAR:
Pink! Yay.

V- LAST TIME YOU WERE IN VEGAS:
Never been and don't particularly want to go.

W- YOUR WISH:
That my friends and family will stay healthy, and that one day I will find a lovely man to marry. Ok so that's two wishes, but they're the only two I would make even if I was offered three.

X- X-RAYS TAKEN THIS YEAR:
Never had one in my life! I'm very healthy.

Y- NAME THAT STARTS WITH A Y:
Yolande. How random.

Z- ZODIAC SIGN:
Libra. Like it matters.

Photos

Photos of Lucy, Stu & Craig's party are now up on my MSN space. No embarrassing ones this time - everyone looks fab! Yay.

Quotes

Have just returned from Juicy, Stu and Craig's housewarming party which was fabulous. The lovely Miss Critchley has requested a drunken blog entry, so although I'm not drunk I thought I'd oblige by listing the quotes of the evening.

Alicia: "I was in A&E and a lady came in with something stuck inside her".
Andy H: "Was it a Nokia 8210?"

Alicia: "Andy's new name is Agent Head".
Andy R: "That sounds like a really shit brand of toilet cleaner".
Dave: "Put Agent Head under your rim".

All in all a fantastic evening. Kudos to Andy Lay for managing to create a sentence totally devoid of innuendo out of the dirty fridge magnets, and to Stu for mixing such great cocktails. I may have only had 2 but they were both yummy! It was great to see Jo and Mike again, and to have a brilliant girly chat with Lesley on the bus home - looking forward to the weekend in Manchester! I also got to dress up which is always a bonus. I finally finished my film so pictures will be up tomorrow! Hurrah.

There should be more parties like this one. Well done to the fabulous Juicy, Stu and Craig for putting on such a great night for us all!
xxx

Awards evening

Ok so I know I organised this but I have to say...it was bloody fantastic. Everything went perfectly, some really deserving people won prizes and I got flowers and a kiss from the Director - woo! Then my team and I single handedly held up the dancefloor with our fantastic moves and finished up the night waving our hands manically to Bon Jovi. I love work people - they rock. Can't believe it's my last day tomorrow! But I do get to have another pissup so it's all good. And then it's Juicy's pissup on Saturday! Hurrrrrrrrraaaaaaaah.

Mmmm, had soooo much fun. Yaaaaaay.

PS My dress actually creates the illusion that I have boobs!

Must go to bed.