Saturday, May 12, 2007

Eurovision review

So, ladies and gents, the spectacular festival of camp that is Eurovision is over for another year, and I feel that the main events of the evening can best be summed up by the legend that is Sir Terence of Wogan.

On one of the video links: "They're going to hurl themselves into the icy water. They do a lot of this in Finland...and there's a lot of deaths".

On Georgia: "They've got cossack dancers, and there will be sword fighting later. Hurrah".

On Sweden: "An androgynous lad with an interesting line in metallic chest hair". He wasn't lying.

On France: "Gosh, wasn't that awful". Again, an accurate observation. I can't believe they got the same number of points as us.

On Russia: "Now I don't know about you, but I can remember when all Russian girls had moustaches and looked like Kruschev's mother".

Other acts of note were the German swing group, the scary lesbians of Serbia (who won - how?!) and the jaw droppingly special Ukrainians who were definitely robbed.

The evening then moved on to the interval act. "You don't often see this. A man swallowing a flourescent tube".

We then had the voting. On the Ukraine - "Are those your own teeth, dear?". On Russia - "Good evening, Mrs Putin". And on the UK - "It's Fern Cotton! Heavens, I know her! I know that girl".

Finally, the Serbians emerged to sing their winning song, clutching various random paraphernalia. "Is that a traditional Serbian cucumber you've got there, my man?"

A truly special evening as always. I'll leave the final word to Terry - "It's been a wonderful wonderful evening. I mean, not musically of course". Brilliant.


Juicy said...

Ah Sarah, your account is almost as good as hearing it from the man himself. It has brightened my otherwise far too early Sunday morning start x x

Naomi said...

Lol, that's brilliant. What a legend! xx